I have gone to a few churches. I try to like them. Sometimes I even start off liking them. It never last very long. It goes back to my teen years. When I was in my mid to late teens I went to a small church that was very close. The pastor of that churh had a son who liked to party. So one Sunday I am not sure if it was to make herself feel better or to try and warn our parents or what but she went off the deep end. First when I said I went to a small church for real like maybe 10 teens so yeah she was talking about us like us 10 not ingeneral. She started her sermen one Sunday about the teengirl in the church needed to dress more modest, that we where all having sex with random boys, and drinking and doing drugs. Even if any of this was true about just one of us, it was not fair to do that to us in front of the intirer church just because she was hurting. It felt like we where being put out in front of a hungry pack of wolfs with meat tied around our neck. My perents where not there that Sunday, and at the point in my life my mother new where I stood as far as sex,and all that stood. The other girls some of them where still virgins where still looked at like drunk whores. That was the first time I felt let down by "the church" because no one even tried to stop her. That was the last time I went to that church.
I then started going back to the church I went to as a small child the head pastor the was cought having sex with a hocker, I wonder how on one new how far he had straded. Where was he leading his flock. Once again I felt let down and left.
Not long after that a women I looked up to. Someone who to me was a good wife, a good mother and a women of Christ that was fun to be around. She was the kind of woman I wanted to be. She was a mentor and a friend. Sometimes you look at people and only see what you want to see and I think that is what I did in this case. We lost touch. I hope he life is working out well.
I would go to this chuch once or twice or that church but nothing ever felt like home.
A girl I worked with had told my that my childhood church had a new pastor and had made some changes that I should check it out. So on Christmas Eve my husband, oldest son and I went it was wonderful. We started going and for the couple of months things where ok. As the weeks went on I started to notice that they talked alot about money. I mean they would spend like 15 minutes each week talking about offerings. It started to down on me. When I was very lilttle because of some work my uncle does through that church I got to see some of the homes of the pastors that work there. No the churches do not own the houses. We would be invited for dinner or lunch that is how I got to see the house, they where big. So after I remebered that I started looking at the cars parked in the Pastor's Parking spots nice cars. by the way this church has more then one pastor. This churh is really big and they wanted to build a new wing and put the BIGGEST cross you could ever think of on top the building. No wonder they had to talk about money ALL the time. The started talking about legacy gifts thats what they where calling offerings over $10,000. Two weeks in a row the entire sermen was about these $10,00 legacy gifts. Once again I felt let down and have not been back to that or any other church. If I only wanted to talk about money I would watch Money watch on TV.
I don't think a CHURCH is the place for me. I think I put to much pressure on the building and everyone in it to live up to my standerd. Maybe whrn someone is put in charge of a building and is given money that others have GIVEN to him, they feels the need to make the building bigger and then needs more money to see that dream come true. If he acts as if it is God's will to make the church bigger people are more willing to help him reach his goal. The leaders of the church also need to keep themselfs in the livestyle that he and his family have become use to. So if the price of gas has gone up then the offerings need to go up to keep the Hummer full so the wife can go to me mall to buy a $500 purse so that leads to the Pastor needing to remind the church members that the Bible tell them to give with a willing heart.
I think Iwill stay home on Sunday and pray with my family there. I know where to find good and I don't think you need to go to church to do so.
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